Growth

Wow, didn't realize how long it's been since I last posted...my apologies to anyone who cares :)

I was responding to an email from Elyse when my email somehow turned into a pretty nice blog entry so I'm gonna just paste that in here for now... she asked me to tell her one thing i learned about myself this past week and this is how it turned out:

I learned that i am not automatically good with kids...b/c some kids just don't care about what i have to say and won't listen. i've never worked with kids who challenge me this much or (most of whom) who aren't super excited to see me everyday (or at least don't show it). at the same time, while this was a little disheartening to realize, it made me work harder and be more creative in how i do my job. b/c of this, i also learned that i can rise to a challenge. i think i am getting better already at controlling the kids and i think i've had maybe a few successful ideas that they've liked. pretty much, i realized i don't have a choice b/c i'm here all year so i better make it work haha.

this is just a side note, but i'm sitting in my office at work right now (or i was when i was writing this email) and i'm right off of the main room/entrance to the cyo (it used to be a warehouse of some sort so its a big huge room w/3 tables and chairs, a couple foosball tables, air hockey, and ping pong - all of which are pretty beat up and/or broken). every morning when i come in there are refugees sitting on the benches and standing around the room waiting to talk to anyone who can help them. this morning for some reason there was a huge crowd of them and the room was pretty much full of people a few mins ago. the greatest part is that they're all speaking different languages and i hear "caseworkers" speaking loud and slow to them and asking if they speak english. i love this part of the day b/c the cyo offers so much to the refugees even if they don't have alot of resources to work with. when they don't have a translator, they make it work. my boss always says this is one of about 3 "safe" places for refugees in the whole city. they don't have to worry about being attacked or made fun of or not receiving help b/c people here will do everything in their power to get things done for them. i have never worked with refugees or known much about them, but this year is already making me want to learn so much more. donations of clothes, furniture, etc. come in everyday...people just leave them in the front entryway and today when i came in it was all over the room. it makes me so happy that somehow this stuff just keeps coming and it's always gone by the end of the day to homes where it can be put to good use. my housemate john just stopped in my office b/c he works upstairs and we were just agreeing that this place is amazing but you can't really get the full effect without being here. so basically, despite its challenges i love my workplace and i will continue to face its challenges head on.

i'd like to add a bit more to make this nice and lengthy to make up for lack of posts. i was talking to my housemate matt briefly about this whole thing with the kids not always being excited to see me like most kids i've worked with. he noted that that just gives me a glimpse of what their life has been/is like. they haven't grown up trusting people b/c people haven't given them a reason to trust in humanity. so when i tell them to do stuff, they have to gradually come to trust that i'm doing it b/c i care and b/c it's for their own good and that i'm not lying to them. he pointed out that the reason suburban kids (like those i typically work with) have most of the time grown up around caring adults and so they have no reason not to trust me and love me and be excited to see me. i think this is an interesting point and maybe holds a bit of truth, if not in every situation. i do think the kids are getting better and i'm making more of a connection with some of them rather than just being seen as the disciplinarian, which makes me happy.

just to fill you in on a few more things, this weekend i went to philly to surprise my sister for parents weekend (she thought only my parents and bro were going, not me, my other sister and my grandma) so that was fun and it was nice to be "pampered" for a weekend (meaning having my parents pay for things and not have to worry about it)...not that i usually do worry, it was just nice. it was also good to have a bit of time all together. finally, this weekend is the 10th reunion for franciscorps. since FC is 10 years old bro jim invited all the alumni back (along w/spouses and kids) for a huge reunion/celebration which i'm super excited for but which also means a lot of work for us to get done to prepare this week.

i'll try to be better about updating more often, but no guarantees. feel free to fill me in on your lives as well, especially if i haven't been doing as a good a job as i should with keeping in touch!